“ The fear I want to get rid of is rooted in my need to be popular with young people-a need that may be endemic among people who become teachers but one that keeps us from serving our students well” (p. 50).
With this one sentence Parker Palmer (2007) completely knocked me off my rocker. I realized that I share this fear with Palmer and this realization was not an easy pill to swallow. I have always viewed my youth and ability to “relate” to students as my greatest strength, however after this latest Palmer reading, I wonder if it has been my greatest hindrance. I am an alumnus of the school at which I work and from the second I was hired, I strove to be the “cool” teacher that I thought students would admire. I like to think this is because in my own high school experience most of the teachers who had a positive influence on me were those who I perceived to be “cool” and able to relate to my life as a student. I guess my rational was that if students viewed me as popular or “cool” they might be more inclined to seek me out for advice or counsel. Or if nothing else, they might be more open to the ideas I was presenting. This in turn would increase my number of opportunities to help guide them and be of service to their needs. However, the more I thought about this fear and how it has manifested itself in my teaching, the more instances I recognized where I had fallen victim to the trap of which Palmer speaks, “It leads me to pander students, to lose both my dignity and my way” (p.50). It scares me to think of how many students I may have overlooked because of my own shallowness. How many students’ attempts at friendship or mentorship went unnoticed? How many opportunities for “divine encounters” have I wasted? From this day forward, I resolve to no longer allow my fear of being viewed as unpopular and un-cool sway my approach to teaching or my personal interactions with students!
I would like to share this wonderful quote regarding our deepest fear:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” - AMEN!
(Marianne Williamson, quoted by Nelson Mandela in his 1994 inauguration speech)
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1 comment:
Wonderful insights! Especially, that one about being "cool". I think that regarles of pretending to be some one to be accepted and praised, our call as educators (as you had said) is to shine; not for our selves, but for the One who call us to "be". Your right! There is work to do. Becoming an authentic human and educator requires us to unvest of all the things we are wearing (including our fears) to gain others appreciation, and just let selves be (with our human nakeness and vulnerability) and shine.
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